Wednesday, November 28, 2007
went to mr loh's wake yesterday.
all of us were seeking for closure i think.
i needed to see his coffin, and when i did, i felt this sinking feeling of acceptance, the acceptance of the whole absurdity of the situation.
i could feel it, i finally accepted that mr loh is no longer with us.
i was thankful that i didnt need to see his bloated up body.
such that i can remember him as he was,
muscles too big for his head, nicely shaped,
his tanned skin, cheeky smile,
clad in his blue shirt and white shorts.
the councillors at the wake were no help at all.
they just wanted us to talk, and talk, and talk.
about mr loh.
they will never understand.
just like how the rest of us will never be able to understand the grief felt by mr and mrs loh.
they were so strong, walking around, talking about their son to various groups of people, smiling, and smiling, and smiling.
so hard, so difficult.
we saw his photos.
mr loh looked so cute when he was younger, doing loads of naughty things.
we laughed, many times, but it was a sad sort of laughter, almost hollow, and memories of him kept flashing in our minds.
and when we were about to leave, we took one last look at his coffin.
remembrance.
acceptance.
closure.
hui jun published at 11/28/2007 07:20:00 PM
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